Instead, I was too consumed with rage. Aside from my boy Kennyi (first televised speller in history to not be a social moron) ousted early in the Championship Round on the word Palatschinken, third place finisher Aishwarya Pastapur was such a moronic robot, if I could have found the remote, I would have thrown it through the TV.
Spelling Bee Dude: The word is Guayabera.
Aishwarya: May I have the definition?
Spelling Bee Dude: Guayabera is a men's shirt popular in Latin America.
Aishwarya: May I have the part of speech please?
Spelling Bee Dude: It's a noun.
Of course it's a noun you stupid ninny! Spelling Bee Dude just said it was a shirt. C'mon, you're in the Championship Round of the National Spelling Bee and you're asking if a shirt is a noun? For shame.
While I couldn't find the remote, I was able to fish my phone out from between the couch cushions and fired off this angry missive to Twitter.
Thinking it'd be sweet if Ogre busted into the National Spelling Bee and said "No. C-A-T really spells dog" and started tossing nerds.
Take that world!
Cut to this morning and I've got a message from Dreidel Hustler telling me to check out an awesome interview with Donald "Ogre" Gibb.
This is the third time now I've made some dumb reference on Twitter and have it pay off in some magical way.
The interview with Mr. Gibb is nothing short of amazing. Donald could really give those kids a run for their money in a who knows more big words contest but this quote has already made my day and I haven't even put on pants.
I had Jean-Claude Van Damme kicking my ass between takes naked just so he could maintain his hard-on while he was doing groupies in his trailer.
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